Ask iPigeon.institute: why do my genitals smell like I’m dirty from out of nowhere, lately?

 I’ve been experiencing this phenomenon going on years, at this point, albeit in intervals. The experience of having this sort of debacle befall one’s self is a traumatic and humiliating one, to be certain, because most of us take care to keep ourselves clean. So why does this sort of thing happen? It would nearly seem as though we had somehow had a lapse in consciousness, where somebody had molested us, intentionally wiping their body odor on us, whereas we may have become aware of this; for me, for living out on the streets - it becomes a questionable occurrence, as well: then I clean myself, and it ends up happening all over again, whereas only a short time had passed, and there had been no established belief of that I had had a lapse in consciousness, or a strange encounter. Is it epilepsy? How could the continuity of time have been so seamlessly thwarted? It would, on the surface level, imply that there is a state of warfare, here in The Militarized Zone of DTLA and surrounding localities, of an unimaginable cost. There may be this sort of unspoken, ongoing strife and expenses wrought upon society, from where we stand, and stay, here, while intimations of “perhaps” truths are lobbed at us, some of them, an attempt to evince belief, others, to challenge us, of our beliefs, and some things that seem beyond belief. 

So, what is the truth? 

On some level, it’s important to simply just not freak out. Just recognize, or look it up: we do live in The Militarized Zone here. I didn’t know it until I started studying for my A+ certification, and I got the big book, for my studies. It seemed a somewhat aside note, yet somehow conceded, here, in this premise, for the techies. For the tech guys to understand. To gloat over it, or to disavow it would suppose that they’d been lying in this book of standard literature that many of us (perhaps mostly guys, this being the tech field and industry) had studied. I never went through with taking the test and certifying, but this inclusion of information was a preeminent and formative small facet of truth that was imbued in to my life. 

To continue, upon “not freaking out,” it simply “makes sense” that we’re here, by our own choice and volition, and many of us had been indulging in the vice industries, here. On some level, it’s somewhat “allowed;” even included, in the list of startup business licenses that are available out here, in the city of Los Angeles (at some point, perhaps I’ll come across this moment, once again, in my own startups pursuits, and I’ll include the link; I feel that it would be a bit of an arcane lore thing to rediscover, and cite, at this point in time. At least the article will have been written, already, though). 

The perhaps more sensible truth, that I’ll offer, being that casual remote sensing acquaintanceships and “portrayals,” I’ll say, are common - particularly for a guy like me, who tries to appear fetching and attractive. For example, an attractive young lady, about my age, or so, passed by me, as I was bummed out on the ground, earlier today. She was walking her dog. The supposition that I’d been attracted to her was gleaned, via intelligence, observing all of my interactions, feelings, thoughts, and emotions, all the time. Just maybe, she was attracted to me, as well. I personally choose to tread carefully, on this sort of context, since I know that I’m a bum. So how does this sort of thing happen? Is she a prostitute, smelling her day’s partner, and it becomes transmutable upon my own personage, for that a compellingly charming flirtation episode unraveled itself, as though she knew that I’m the pigeon-feeding bum? What did she really feel? was one of the suggestions lobbed at me. She was sociably a superior to me, as many women of this sort are: they get at the truth of sociability, in regards to many types of guys, and of girls who are like them, who live out this sort of prostitution-based lifestyle. 

Or am I being stalked by guys who are upset that they’re outside, and there’s a handsomer bum out here, being a narcissist, and they somehow command this capability? I certainly doubt that I had an unbeknownst (and, for that matter), commonplace sort of genitalia-smell exchange sort of sicko molestation sort of quick encounter, of a reputation that I don’t know about, happening to me. That would seem to imply an inordinate demand upon people of a type of cost and primacy basis, of being somewhere at a timely-enough jaunt, such to render me a more humble and hapless man, whereas I don’t really deserve that sort of outcome, in life. Sure, I had once (only once, though), been an ass-grabber, and I’d “somewhat” molested women, and all of these sorts of events were, in fact, consensual activities, and I was just a guy who’d been brought up, in part, of a detrimental nature, to have given me this sort of psychotic abandon and sense of entitlement of inappropriateness. So I did this sort of thing, many years ago, back in my youth. I don’t talk much to guys, so I don’t really know how prevalent this agreement of seeking and discovering a prostitute, for patronage, actually happens. Much of what I hear is conjecture, simply put.

I just feed the sparrows. I won’t deny that resonance warfare tactics exist, and I also wouldn’t quite suppose that people “don’t” commonly hear voices in their head, and I’d somewhat believe that people do establish face to f1ce relationships, perhaps sometimes, only, based on positive affirmations and positive conditioning that occurs, as a consequence of having been coddled, by what amounts to a support mechanism, of the intelligence community, that transpires, whereas I feel that the excuse is that we’re shy around each other, and perhaps not ready to really take the plunge, whereas more bold men, better for it, for a moment, or for a more long-term outset about things, are the ones who gain inroads in to establishing romantic relationships at this point in time, and so far. I feel that it’s well enough if I get people to acknowledge me and smile, perhaps, and it boosts my self esteem a little, when that happens. A truly serendipitous occasion, or opportunity, is a much more rare thing, although it more typically winds up in producing a long-term relationship, more fruitfully, and surely so, whereas I can imagine that it’s difficult to convince someone to not continue forth in life, as a prostitute. It’s awrr rawr rough and tough, not being a prostitute, I imagine. 

Contributing user analytics to improve web browsing experiences through engaging with advertisers and developers.

Maybe you've noticed it, here and there, at some point, in the past: while browsing the web, a strangely relevant facet of your recent life and goings-on, in the world, are suddenly brought back in to your forefront through an ad banner, from out of the periphery of pursuing web-browsing stuff. 

I've been there. I'd believe that many people could relate. Perhaps, at some point, the accuracy of the advertisement that caught your attention was too much to bear, and you switched your account and advertising opt-in settings for advertisement content and context, and you shut them all off, in a slight panic. 

While the intricacies of just how these things play out, in the world of advertising agencies, and development, I'd say that a more rational perspective is that we live in a world, where engaging with the retail sector has been one of our favored pasttimes, at least, on some occasions. It stands to consider that the retailers appreciate our patronage of their operation, and, like many self-starting entrepreneurs, we'd established some slight nuances of connectivity, just slightly more up, on the threshold of friendliness, as opposed to professionalism, which is expected of retail operations. 

Nowadays, with so many businesses still shuttered, from the public health crisis still abound, it makes me wonder what caused them to perhaps fail, permanently, or what's holding them together, for such a long stretch of the imagination. I had always lived a month-to-month sort of lifestyle, in my entrepeurial endeavors. 

Now, with that I feed the birds, on such a regular basis, keeping in mind that the pigeon is the "homeless person's pet," or so, it goes, I have a keepsake token of opportunity to say that I could see myself doing what I'm doing now, far in to the future, and I'd still have my bird-feeding endeavors as a daily to-do, for my stability's sake, and that I'm doing something that returns fruits to my labors, given that little Mr. Sparrow, of the Grand Park area, has taken a fondness to me, undoubtedly for his family's sake, for recognizing that I'm the one who feeds him the sweet treats, most of the time. He just, earlier in the morning, actually once again visited me. I think he's hanging out on the cellular service delivery antenna. It's a serene little soiree of common fare, out here. Me and the birds. 

In a similar manner, our user identities and facets of our online behavior and habits must be similarly valuable to advertising agencies, who, in this day and age, of a hard sell, for advertisers, facing uncertain economic conditions and social cudtoms, themselves, now coming in to question; particularly in an area such that I live in; yet, with internet data service being patched through, and provided for us, even our autonomy of assuming that we're « somewhere, or other », being put to question. 

My service regularly reports that my location is in Chicago, Illinois, and Texas. I get news articles lobbed at me, from those locations, in many apps and feeds I visit. 

Somehow, though, the relevance of personal and identifying behavior, over time, had become a welcome feature of improving my esteem about my place, in the ecosphere, of the larger identity that my online life turns out to be, and of the richness of the interaction and engagement experiences have been, while observing, here and there, the blunders of people who "just don't care" to compose themselves well, of their outward appearance before others; oftentimes, perhaps - simply a matter of that they just don't realize how unsober they'd become. 

There's several things that are becoming of composure, yet - another facets of modern-day etiquette is that proper sociable consideration for others is typically met with improvements, in life, on many measures, whereas going back to a place of abuse, time and again,with no news as to otherwise, that had developed - is largely quite likely to yield such similar results of abuse, again, inevitably. 

All in all, much of the rough and tumble work of the intricacies of measuring and analyzing bulk swaths of data, had already been carried out, painstakingly, by the scientists and engineers who brought us the internet, and social media - for example, which markets itself towards our desire for rewards, in the form of fulfillment upon expectations. One of the headlines that I came across today, was the old adage - "a failure to plan, is a plan to fail," which becomes a strangely hinged magnet of contingency operators within the mesh of our lives, as various entities wish to market themselves to us, for the sake of fulfilling their own expectations. 

That being said, if you expect poor results, and yet, still maintain the relationship, that's simply a false attachment to courtesy, or for laziness' sake, yet, otherwise known as the Stockholm Syndrome, in psychology - where victims (hostages), rather, over time, tended to - in this historic study - begin to empathize with their captors. I'd say that it were a failing prospect to simply endeavor that there's not simply better people out there, than a person that treats you poorly. In this country (the United States of America), we are given the freedom to leave, while also having the burden of due process, in criminality, to suppose that people are not simply guilty,until proven innocent. 

Given that I hear voices, and many of them, at that, as a person largely of a socially isolated sort, it begs the question, of "should I be narcissistic and grandiose, as a shortcoming?" or believe that damaging the relationship that's establishing itself, from what's developed, out of an overbearing abundance of propriety, incloseness, being that I was made uncomfortable, and with some people, uncommunicative, obviously languishing behind, in the ever-boding ladder of sociable entrepreneurship, that affords itself to the time-honored classics of the bread-winner; the one who brings home the bacon. In this day and age, baser things, such as sexuality, gender, childhood traumas - all of these sorts of things, could potentially simply matter much less, in the perspective of myriads of enterprising endeavors being bestowed upon the one who might simply compose themselves up, as the better man, better woman, the patient child - the sociable little Mr. Sparrow, of the day, for example - these are all simply choices, to the mind's eye, yet when we become arbitrarily uncomfortable, it stands to reason that someone unfamiliar, or uncommon, or even more of an obscurity, in society - I mean, I'm on the bottom scale of sociable endeavors, to a limited perspective. Criminal pettiness attracts itself like the nuclear watershed attracts filth unto water on cloth, for example. It follows a natural pattern, rather than intelligent design, whereas intelligence is happening all the world over. 

Some people simply behave as if "the world is their oyster," yet many people simply fail to reciprocate the oyster, for it's plénitude in seafood gourmet - it is a strong and constant creature, with a closed mind, except as towards survival, as it knows, of life. 

On one hand, it's got an enterprising establishment about it's reputation, yet, in many circumstances, it's simply controversial to suggest so much of oysters, for eating. 

What's the point? 

Criminals generally take and steal from others, as some form of crime, whereas good people make offerings to others. Given one further, an intelligent design, of an iPigeon-made petitude would demand that the offering be ethically and morally sound, and sustainable. Going further up the ladder of the standards in psychology, the social and ecological benefit of the offering ought be good and fruitful, for the betterment of all, and beyond our own reach, as the winds and the waters expanse will flow and churn, unlike the nuclear watershed, which is still and tense, yet calm, over the broad expanse of noisy things, and frequency wavelengths, of disturbance. 

Now, establishing that some things are disturbing one's self could be simply just enough to establish that someone is a criminal, in pursuit of a victim, which it typically seems to be. 

It doesn't take much, for violence to become established, at least on some occasions, out of the fruitulness of having established a good reputation for a sociable endeavor, as the anomaly to the norm. 

Out here, there's several debacles, not only of such, but also of time - the passing of which, is a strange thing to leave, unobserved, or abandoned. I live in the Pacific Daylight Savings Time locality, as a prospective Maps and Timezones Cloud Platform Applications studies and development inquiries enthusiast. Those sorts of things are the types of things that seem to catch my attentions, lately. I simply wonder at what the possibilities are, and then I set out, and endeavor to live out my standard day, to the best of my capability. 

In general, I'd say that our leaders are best spoken for, when it's established that there's been some nuance of professionalism upon persona that's been established, somehow - of what could possibly be surmised about a person, based on what's offered. Sometimes, it takes a lot of words to establish a suitable particular position, in things, whereas some things, in leadership roles, just seem to be compelling, whereas true leaders train the most, in several manifest facets of the word - in and of themselves, and for others, the same, or less. But for someone who asks too much of what's reasonably accommodable of themselves, it's difficult, on the lower levels of achievement-capability, to truly appreciate much. 

Now, ... Even "now," though. It's a completely different topic, from person, to person, except that many people simply establish the standards of a day, as the day goes by, and as far as days go, and come again. 

I felt like, if I hadn't established some notions of that people had somehow ruined their reputations, for standing against personal freedoms, in life, it would suppose that this entire COVID-19 thing is largely well understood, by and large, for what it might mean, for other people. Other people have been having a huge roil about it, somewhat facetiously; people had gotten away with a lot of garbage behavior, both online, and off - some people planned out criminal activities and victim profiling and targeting, out in society. 

One person's voice said, though, that she hadn't seen anyone "dying," and news reports would affirm that many people who had been reported to have had the coronavirus disease, and died - had comorbid illnesses, on top of coronavirus - to suppose that they had perhaps been targets of some form of nuclear watershed abandonment, neglect, or that they had simply been "nasty" people, whereas I strive to have little of that, as for myself. Even better if I could have none. 

Tobacco, though, and I'll have some, regularly. Feeding the birds, and I'll go to the park. Some other things, I'll simply just not understand, for the moment, and I'd have to leave it, at that.

I see some scattered white bread pieces in the Terminal Metro station;

Then I wonder, what if... they don't all end up being carnival pigeons? 

I suppose that many pigeons will be witnessed on an off day, or venturing out from the flock, but that would be part of the inquisitive nature of the urban pigeons lifestyle. Pigeons land in front of human observers and passersby in order to enact the time-worn ritual of evincing some food. 

Of course, not every creature could possibly be up to a finery carnival performance Fletch, at all times. The organic nature of the crowd and the audience is that of an ebb and flow, around the unfolding of the event, as it happens. 

Then, the sociable behaviors of the post-excitement engagement (for now, it's simply a feeding, but today, it was special food - horchata cream cheese mini sandwich bites). Some of them flutter away, in a flurry of wind, as the unknown signal becomes triggered amongst the birds, in agreement of that they should flee.

I wonder how the Manchester flock is faring. I was tearful at the notion of abandoning them, in to adulting - that they would be. 

Who pays the toll of the confounding [f]actor's role in a role-weary incompetent or insane subject?

Somewhat - 

Alright, « okay » like, I really needed that (most times), or, like, people really [don't] bother to conceal their formants, and self-such character-isms of speech and poise, but I don't really get the lack of sociable attainment, the thing about "just getting it done," 

Rather,

There's this vast contingency of avoidant (I'd forgotten about that one [of abnormal psychology]; the avoidant, the passive-aggressive, the decades gone on, in lacking sobriety and 12 Steps fundamentals, as life. People really do live their lives off of the 12 Steps, when they're in the supportive arms of truly good-meaning sober individuals - I've always self-managed my drug abstinence, because I have a hard time speaking with strangers, and some aspects along those lines. 

For that matter, it feels like you guys are abusing the child of my life-in-suspension - I used to pull Tarot cards for this type of thing. But that was years ago.

Then, I became a person who simply never does the thing that is so characteristically immature, and short-sighted. I did the most menial of digital life-styling reputational upkeep, in cases where I had done others wrong (undoubtedly while in the midst of a manic spree on life; by all means, un-sober): I went back and apologized to the person - digitally, at that, since it was my digital Life up for self-criticism, and for matters of integrity of my self.

The point being, is that, all-in-all, I did do those things, and I could move forth in life flinching with the sour memory of those things lingering - nonewhatsoever. 

Okay, there is this guy, and one other guy, I owe them each about $40-$45. Eek. That's literal money I owe, to leverage my business ethics statistical "perfect," otherwise.

But some of you guys (and ladies) - sheez, ... I guess maybe you guys (and ladies) perhaps never made it out past suburbia; whereas [I seem to have recognized destitute and laboring] {some guys} I've seemed to recognize, out in the open wild, while I'd been "trekking," and how natural the interactions were - just in passing; just maybe, it was "them."

Those kinds of guys don't have this passive-avoidant histrionic persona that pops in to my mind, and acquisitions some arbitration or leverage about my wherewithal and my going-for-show-pigeons better pedigreed self.

On one hand, there's the notion of replicable personae-identities, yet who would be comfortable knowing that I simply « believe » these horrible things about people? Some people.

Some people who don't really do Facebook « well, or properly ». And then, there's this whole thing about speaking in to the phone's speaker {thing} and the expectation that the audio clip-bytes reach me?

 On one hand, I can concede that this is about as "crazy" as I'd come off, given my willingness to « once again » relate the long-windedness and intricacies of a schizotypal personality disorder, such that I have; whereas most people claim that they don't hear voices, whatsoever. 

That's it, though. That's the limit of how « actually » crazy I look; it costs me a blog of relevant content, somewhat, to digress, again, in to abnormal psychology, once again, yet here it be, plain and simple - I'm 38 years old now, so's most people involved, or better (or lesser of consequence, for being third-person removed) - most perhaps-so. The opposing face-to-face second person disposition is truly a rare one, but I do sometimes speak at long-winded lengths about formative aspects of all expected contextual realities and foundational underpinnings, which lead to critical analysis of the "other" person, at hand, but that's not to say that many people who encounter me don't actually mean me harm, given a turn-of-my-back to them. They do, and I realize these things, even as they trouble me.

------------

Then, I inevitably get some web-crawler "bot" hits, after publishing the post to social media, and oftentimes, a colloquy ensues. But I'm moreso that I'd just rather be done, and done with the issue. I could do coffee, at a coffee shop, and forget about it, over a sweet one.

My blog stats - minutes after posting the blog and sharing it to social media.

It could even be a home-spun drink, in a recyclable bottle - but these types of sociable accommodations just fail to get done.

What im im see, here, though, is an imminent troll-of-all-web internet activity, for lack of a better term, in the all-hours readiness to check out my latest blog, type of thing - which could only be « somewhat » okay. The thing of the internet of all hours "thing" is a tired subject - I'm commonly neurotically fraught with the consequences of having done a night of the internet of all hours "thing," and the cost of repairing that deed, with ionic minerals, with medications, with attending personnel and professionals about my mental health patient status, not to mention my social worker - these are all tolls of being improprietuous of what ends up being "for my sake," in which case I have to answer for my [obvious] shortcomings.

The desire to shield one's identity behind remote sensing technology is a dark, loaded vehicle, carrying the impetus of the person's wherewithal that could have been - for having jaunted a fresh, new, identity through stimulant abuse that many find so compelling; yet many also fail to remit a sustainable [or any some-such] contribution to society, whether it be digital or real-life. For that matter, I find that my schuzotypal self commonly lends it's nature to a more familiar term, in that I perceive it as an augmented reality - one where a person's reputation could « precede » their physical presence. Sometimes the voice {conscience} hanging over the shoulder of the guilty is a partner-in-arms, with the self of such person. 

An ultimate chill | post-rock YouTube playlist.

I came across this playlist that I had etched out, one night long ago, while digging through my YouTube accounts for any bitsies or interesty-puff jiggly-pooz that had been a long time buried, back at my old apartment, this past fall, or so. It's super chill, not much on the electronic ambient side, which was refreshing to discover. These are more atmospheric rock ballads and drags, good for when life has become too much to bear, or when it all just had to end, yet here, it ends gracefully, with some smooth riffs and somber melodic tones and vocals.

• Low Roar - Tonight, tonight, tonight
• Saltillo - Giving in
• Flunk - See Through You
• Mono - Halo
• No Clear Mind - Dream is Destiny
• Passion Pit - Its Not My Fault, I'm Happy (Gossamer)
• Summer Fades Away - Thank You
• Arrive Alive - I have Two Shadows
• Kavinsky - Nightcall (Drive Original Movie Soundtrack)
• Papercut - Morning Blues 
• Hammock - Artificial Paradises
• Explosions in the Sky - First Breath After Coma
• This Will Destroy You - There Are Some Remedies Worse...
• This Will Destroy You - Threads
• Circadian Eyes - Finding Silence
• Blueneck - Lilitu
• Sleep Party People - Notes To You
• About You [directed by Vash]
• DulceSky - I Dreamt of You

Regalgalafickenechneyapalum -tous -tous; coming to terms with...

[okay] standard-train adulting into a new standard age demographic (18-35) -post mid-level "tas-tastic" era lively ones on shuttle iffy-jaunt post pop-star party "street kids"

yet,

still: we do ours - Taylor Swift on Rolling Stone 

but wait...

I was raised on the Bible. So much becomes so proxi-auf-neuf-bits-emotionally subjectively promethazine on a lean (bad one) - 

switch to objective puh-fuff-svstication - talking bout sex was not on the menu.

The English Standard Version New Testament {learn about the disparities in proper 

objectality 

on the Apple iOS App Store

• define:objectality

objectal

• Jump to navigationJump to search

  French[edit]

  Adjective[edit]

  objectal (feminine singular objectale, masculine plural objectaux, feminine plural objectales)

  1. (psychology, attributive) object

as towards a distinction Brexit American English: via boredpanda.com}

English Standard Version random opening verse and a read: a vast scurvy tide's pull-in of the Atlantic's finest:fish and shrimp, battered in hen's eggs and rolled grains - but you? Shit you're talking? This is a break out stance demographic adulting control subject standard deviation sober coffee talk analyst's divergence persona by standard's expectance rate: pretty typical, in contrast. A forensics of psych-crime GFYS standard assessment trivial novelty-trite dickens-scratch Libya autonomy fluff-roosters:contend. [for the 3rd degree, (disambiguation) lack thereof pro - auth - subjective take on:at task].

Anecdote of MFT truthing of drugs and truth of drug abuse; accuracy thereof.

1. stub thought

• standard basis of my adulting persona 
• what type of people, why?
• standards of statistics - relationships

• fluff of auld-sated: standards of neuf - elf; nouvelle

transliterative semiotic - semantic breakout ans-lation] Le Lycee Francais

cette par vous frait donnez-mes, il'est top conderamazement, we use etiquette, standard fluff

• nous - novel nous v'elle we to her -- we (new) to her
• : presenting a standard mockup one-off guy for practical considerations: I just got thrown in jail for a week, and I have 100 hours community service to do, also.

Jeanne d'arc - constititularuent prototypical French sainted figure: break down and out semantics and folklore to fluff demographics deviance

- park folklore, part trieste, part fluff - when did it happen?

- off - hand, not sure, but France, as it stands, is autiguinomously farced with living down its such-tosuppose peasantry finery aux-d'estates that it were; being a center of enlightenment and colonialism, did, at times, find the French establishment lacking in resources with which to fend off notable jaunts as towards a new, more flex recontre coup d'etait il coutrements that France had been reputable for, in neighboring imperial and sociopolitical upheavals. In essence, in being the progenitor of many an early modern period cultural heritage namesake t uphold, various geographical considerations of jaunting same old pigeons-feeding territory would come to laid-waste-to, and a Frenchman, many a pigeon fletch scrum jaunteded-AF buntiglios searching the nooks and the sidewalks or corners, inevitably pursued the next, most bold-AF jaunt: somewhere else.

 

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